Karma, biatch.

You know how in Liar’s Poker, Michael Lewis talks about that “big swinging dick” that walks through the office as if he owns anything and everything? Yeah, well, that swinger came into Stern during a common hour event in the form of a Real Estate MD at Morgan Stanley when I was a sophomore. I remember being horrified after the event and saying to myself, “Morgan Stanley may be the second most sought after BB at Stern to work for post-grad, but I ain’t getting into that line.”

Well you know what? Here’s karma to you for telling me to forget working for MS if I have less than a 3.7 GPA and for thinking that you’re sucha bigshot. Because you know what, you epically screwed up! I hope you enjoy eating that pie that I’m planning to donate to the homeless shelter around Thanksgiving.

 

Morgan Stanley Property Fund Faces $5.4 Billion Loss

·          Morgan Stanley has told investors in its $8.8 billion real-estate fund that it may lose nearly two-thirds of its money from bum property investments.

·          That would likely make it the biggest dollar loss ($5.4 billion) in the history of private-equity real-estate investing. Over the past 20 years, Morgan Stanley's real-estate unit was one of the biggest buyers of property around the world, doing some $174 billion in deals since 1991, mostly with money raised from pension funds, college endowments and foreign investors.

·          The losses come from investments in properties such as the European Central Bank's Frankfurt headquarters, a big development project in Tokyo and InterContinental hotels across Europe, among others.

·          The loss also represents a huge challenge for the firm as it tries to resuscitate its Morgan Stanley Real Estate Funds business, known as Msref.

·          The soured investments made by the $8.8 billion fund, Msref VI International, continue to be a distraction for Morgan Stanley as it tries to extricate the fund from complex deals around the world. In many cases, the company can't walk away from foundering investments because the fund made billions of dollars in guarantees.

·          Morgan Stanley now is negotiating with lenders to reduce the fund's obligations on the money it borrowed, its interest payments, renovation costs and other expenses.

·          Adding to the difficulties, the economic downturn and big real-estate losses have rattled some of Msref's core investors, leading to a challenging fund-raising environment. Morgan Stanley has sought to raise a new, $10 billion fund, Msref VII Global.
Source: Wall Street Journal Online

 

What is love? Answers from 4-8 year olds

What Love means to a 4-8 year old.  

A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, 'What does love mean?' 

The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined.. See what you think.



'When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. 
So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love.'
 

Rebecca- age 8


'When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. 
You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.' 

Billy - age 4


'Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs.' 

Chrissy - age 6


'Love is what makes you smile when you're tired.' 

Terri - age 4


'Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK.' 

Danny - age 7


'Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. 
My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss' 

Emily - age 8


'Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen.' 

Bobby - age 7 (Wow!)


'If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate,' 

Nikka - age 6 
(we need a few million more Nikka's on this planet)

 


 

'Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well.' 

Tommy - age 6

 


'During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. 
He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore.' 

Cindy - age 8


'My mommy loves me more than anybody 
You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night.' 

Clare - age 6


'Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken.'

Elaine-age 5


'Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford.' 

Chris - age 7


'Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day.' 

Mary Ann - age 4


'Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn't think it's gross.' 

Mark - age 6


'You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.' 

Jessica - age 8

 


And the final one 

The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife. 

Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there. 

When his Mother asked what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said, 

'Nothing, I just helped him cry'

Is YOUR non-Toyota gas pedal affected by this recent recall?

 

Get a load of this- even if you don’t own one of the recently recalled Toyota models, you may still be affected by this pedal crisis. The supplier of these pedals, CTS, doesn’t just make pedals for Toyota. Other companies that they sell to include:

  • Nissan
  • Honda
  • Mitsubishi
  • Airline Companies

The way to tell whether you have a CTS pedal that is affected in these recalls is by looking at the lines on the pedal. If you have 7 lines (according to radio station 710), then it means you have the CTS pedal. If you only have 4, it means it was made by another company (these are pedals that are in the Japanese made Toyota cars. The American made ones use the CTS pedals).

The guy on the talk show speculated that it’s a mechanical problem, probably something related to a pin being jammed after use. If that really is the case, major fail.

Toyota recall: What to do if your car's on the list


By Peter Valdes-Dapena, senior writer

January 27, 2010: 12:27 PM ET


NEW YORK (CNNMoney.com) -- Last week Toyota recalled 2.3 million vehicles, some of them among America's most popular cars, and this week announced it will stop making those models while it works to find a fix for the problem.

But if you already own one of these cars, the automaker says you could safely continue to drive it, as long as you aren't noticing any problems. To make matters even more confusing, most cars involved in this recall were already involved in an earlier, unrelated recall involving gas pedals sticking on floor mats.

Which cars are involved? This specific recall affects Toyota's 2009-2010 RAV4, Corolla and Matrix models; the 2005-2010 Avalon; 2010 Highlander; 2007-2010 Tundra and the 2008-2010 Sequoia; and some 2007-2010 Camrys (only those with gas pedal assemblies made by a specific Toyota supplier; your dealer can check). No Lexus or Scion models are involved.

What's this recall for? Over time, gas pedals in some of the recalled cars become sticky. At first, they just become a little harder to push down and, when you lift your foot off the gas, slower to come back up. In the worst case, the pedal on these cars can become stuck part way down. That, of course, could mean the car keeps accelerating even after you take the foot off the gas.

How's Toyota going to fix it? The automaker is still working on a solution, which will probably involve replacing all or part of the gas pedal assembly.

If there's no solution yet, and the cars supposedly are safe to drive, why recall them now? Toyota says it just wants to make Toyota owners aware of the issue so that if they start having problems, they know what to do. Once Toyota finds a solution, drivers will be notified and asked to bring their car to a dealership for repair.

What if I notice problems? If your gas pedal starts to feel sticky, stop driving immediately, Toyota says. Pull over in a safe place, then call a dealer and have them come get your car.

What if the gas pedal is really stuck? If it's stuck part way down, applying the brakes should be enough to slow the car and bring it under control. Don't pump the brakes, though. That will just weaken your power brakes. Instead, press and hold the brakes. Also, at the same time, you can shift the transmission into neutral, which will stop the engine from driving the wheels.

It's good to know what to do in cases like this no matter what type of car you drive, said Jake Fisher, senior automotive engineer for Consumer Reports magazine. Although even in cars affected by this recall, it's a rare occurence, he said, it can happen in almost any car model as it gets older.

What if I'm not having any problems... yet? Since the problem develops gradually over time, Toyota says, you should have plenty of warning before the pedal gets really sticky. If you're concerned, take your car to a Toyota dealer and they can tell if your gas pedal is still OK. Remember, though, there is still no prescribed remedy.

Beyond the recall, why stop making and selling all these cars? Toyota says it wants to ensure the safety of its customers and restore confidence in their brand. While that may well be true, Toyota is also under a legal obligation to stop selling cars that are under a recall, according to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration.

Since Toyota still hasn't figured out a remedy for this problem, a Toyota spokesman said, they had to stop production until a fix could be found. Otherwise, Toyota would be filling dealer inventories with cars that needed to be fixed and couldn't be sold until they were.

What's all this about floor mats? This latest recall is unrelated to an earlier, and still ongoing, recall of 4.2 million cars to fix a problem in which the gas pedal could get hung up on the car's floor mats. Most of the cars -- 1.7 million of them -- involved in this recall are also covered by that one.

What's the remedy for the floor-mat problem? In that case, Toyota is altering the actual pedal itself to make it shorter and, therefore, less likely to get stuck on the lip of the mat. Toyota also is replacing the floor mats in some cars. In some Toyota and Lexus models, the automaker also is installing a "brake override" system, which immediately cuts engine power to the wheels when the brake pedal is pressed. In the meantime, Toyota is advising drivers who haven't yet had their cars worked on to remove the floor mats.

What else is Toyota doing to prevent problems like this? Toyota says it is making "brake override" -- a system that cuts engine power to the wheels as soon as the brake pedal is pressed -- standard equipment on all of its cars.

Is there more Toyota could do? Some experts, including those at Consumer Reports magazine, have suggested that Toyota change how the "keyless start" system in its cars operates. In some Toyota and Lexus models, the driver can start or turn off the car without using the key by just pressing a button in the dashboard.

If one of those models were to start accelerating wildly, a driver could turn the engine off while still driving by pressing and holding that button for three seconds. But a panicked driver, especially one who wants to keep both hands on the steering wheel of his speeding car, is unlikely to do that. Instead, he's more likely to press the button briefly but repeatedly. In a Nissan with keyless start, for instance, three presses like that would do the trick.

Consumer Reports suggests that Toyota alter how its keyless ignition works to match Nissan's model. Toyota has not said it plans to do that.

Super-distracting websites/blogs that nitpick designs (and for good reason)

in the past 12 hours (8 including sleep) i have been chuckling to myself incessantly, to the point where my mother has labeled me as insane. the first comes from a guy who decided to do something about something that all annoys the shit out of us- boarding passes. as he so correctly states, "the design of boarding passes makes me want to scratch my eyes out."

i'm glad that i'm not the only one who has trekked to the wrong gate because of incompetent designs.

Before: 

After:

Media_httppassfailsqu_lelwa

 

And this is just plain hilarious, but once again, completely correct. it's amazing how much companies spend on marketing when they fail to focus on the current aspects of their businesses that can generate a tangible result.

 

 

MASA receipt
Right:
A receipt from Masa Restaurant NYC
(this is not my actual receipt)

This particular behavior has always baffled me. When a customer leaves a business, there is generally only one physical thing they take with them as a reminder of the experience: the receipt. But most companies treat the receipt as a wasted expense -- and buy the shittiest and crappiest paper and ink possible -- instead of as a marketing expense. This is a huge mistake. The receipt is an opportunity to build brand recognition and customer attachment. It’s like a trojan horse advertisement to people who balance their checkbooks. For some reason, I have never seen a receipt treated as a marketing/branding opportunity. For example, imagine if you went to Starbucks and received the receipt below.

 

 

Below:
A mockup of a better Starbucks receipt

 

Starbucks receipt
If this receipt was printed on nice slightly-thicker paper with properly kerned fonts, You’d probably stop and look at it for a few seconds before you put it away. You might even keep it or share it with friends. It’s something remarkable. It’s something that says “hey, we value your purchase, so we’ll spend some time on your receipt.” Obviously, this exact design is impractical for lots of reasons, but some compromise between this and the crap they have now would be a great revenue-generating opportunity for many companies.

A hundred years ago, receipts were sometimes handwritten in calligraphy. The receipt was a work of art as well as proof of purchase. But somewhere in the transition from analog to digital, the art of the receipt was lost. •

 

And there's tons more. Just read more of their posts.

That's one great analogy

Taken from http://www.newtoyork.com/words/#

Hi, if you are coming to this site via Internet Explorer 6, you might not be getting the best experience possible. Honestly, I can't even begin to think about what your entire experience on the internet must be like? (...probably like riding a bike on the highway while cars blow by you on their way to Costco to get gallons of mayonnaise and 60-inch plasma TV's). How will you ever be able to use this website?????? You wont. You're an asshole and your browser is an asshole. So look, I'm going to be honest: I kind of hate you. BUT we c-a-n make this work. Here is what I am going to need you to do: fire up your Toshiba ShitBook© that weighs about 45 pounds, wipe the Cheeto dust off the screen, download Safari, delete Internet Explorer from your computer, punch yourself in the face, and get me a pulled pork sandwich.

 

Kraft fail

How it managed to end up on the worst identities of 2009 TWICE will never cease to amaze me...

Only five months later Kraft Foods unveiled a revised logo that was supposed to be an improvement. You know the expression “Putting lipstick on a pig”? This is like switching the lipstick from the pig’s mouth to the pig’s you-know-what.
 
http://www.underconsideration.com/brandnew/archives/the_best_and_worst_identities_of_2009.php/

(download)

December 26

3:142 No one dies unless Allah permits. The term of every life is fixed. He that desires the reward of this world shall have it; and he that desires the reward of the life to come shall have it also. We will surely reward the thankful.
- The Qur'an

I am thankful for all that I have, for the life I have been granted, and for the opportunities I have been given.

May you rest in peace.

And you thought CAS kids weren't as cutthroat. Actually, they're just more creative.

So got the following string of emails from my Roman History class in the past 24 hours. I have never seen nor read anything funnier. The last email especially made my night, despite that it is 5am and I am still in Stern. It's not long...please read if you're interested. Each color represents a different sender. Have fun and just thank the lord you are not Sheena Yap!- Cathy

 

make sure you read the one in bolded black and those after...

 

Hey guys,
For those who haven't opted to take the final early (like me because they had other finals all week) or have and r just super nice: Does anyone have any notes from November 3 or December 1?
I honestly do not remember why I have gaps in my notes on those two days from the sem but if anyone would be kind enough to send me anything they have, that would be awesome!

If you guys also have any questions about anything for the final, I'd love to answer or help you study.

Thanks,
Karina

the word documents on my laptop of the lectures from Nov 3, 5, 10, and 12 seems to have been corrupted and I can't open them. can anyone please send me a copy of the notes from these lectures? any help is appreciated. Thanks in advance

Hey friends,

Could anybody send me notes from the 2nd half? I haven't gone to class since the midterm. Thanks.


Dear History of the Roman Empire students,
Could I please get any notes from the second semester because my computer decided to fall 6 feet from the top of my closet and break. Thankfully all of my first half notes were handwritten. Please help I'm on the verge of having a heart attack.
Thanks!
Jenelle


To my dearest classmates,

This is addressed to all of you have been bombarding our inboxes with desperate cries for notes. If you haven't got notes by now, you are pretty much screwed for the exam. Hence, there is no point in trying to get people to send you notes by making up half-assed stories about how your notes got stolen/destroyed/eaten. If you really don't have notes, read the damn books that he assigned to us and stop being so lazy.

I think I speak on behalf of all the people who got through the final one way or another without having to beg for notes. Happy holidays guys.

Love,
Sheena

Dear Sheena,

Last week a Peruvian flute band broke into my dorm room and deliberately corrupted my computer files containing notes for the entire second half of the semester.

Could I have yours?

Lots of love

Dearest Sheena

Earlier, you wrote an impassioned, well written, and relatively reasonable letter to a number of your classmates.  I, unfortunately, am not a reasonable person, and I'm petty.  Partly because, like you, I am finished with exams and partly because I'm a little drunk right now, I would like to respond.   It may lack the prose and logic of your e-mail, but I assure you that it is written with an equal amount of passion and contempt.

You are understandably upset that your mailbox is being flooded with pleas for help, especially if you are unable to provide the materials that would resolve their problem.  You can't give them what they want and, because you are perfect and everyone else is stupid and lazy, you can't sympathize with those those who don't have notes because of health issues, conflicting priorities, or experienced the unfortunate sabotage by Peruvian flute bands.  So, with the rational mind of a total bitch, you thought, "Hey!  Why don't I tell these people how screwed they are, explain why they're inferior, and then end my tirade with mock sweetness."  Well done cunty, you really proved how difficult it is to hit the delete button so you can make room for those e-mails from Japanese business men setting up the time and place for your Christmas Eve bukkake.  

I'd like to leave you with a quote from one of my favorite writers.  I feel it adequately captures the sentiment of this e-mail, and it is far more inventive than anything I've managed to put into words thus far:

"Eat all the dicks. Open your bitter, miserable mouth and eat all the dicks. Stop using that mouth of yours to whine, and get started on all these dicks you need to be eating. Keep eating dicks, even at night, even on weekends. Intuition will tell you that you’ve had enough dicks, but you will be wrong: You will never have eaten enough dicks. You may say 'I don’t care what you think,' to which I’d respond, 'That’s some tough talk for someone with an acre of dicks in their mouth.'
And even when you meekly protest that they don’t measure dicks in acres, I won’t be able to hear you.
Because of all the dicks."

Happy holidays you jackass, and to the rest of my classmates who showed the moral fortitude to simply ignore the e-mails from people asking for help, rather than berate them, I congratulate you on being a far more decent person than Sheena a.k.a the Nut Gobbler.  And if you have typed up your notes and it isn't too much trouble, help out your classmates.  You probably don't know them and therefore don't owe them anything, but consider that it's the holiday season and who among us hasn't needed help with an exam in the past?  Anyway, have a great winter break everyone who isn't Sheena, I hope you manage to get through your finals okay and that your semester ends well.

Much Love,

Harry